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What I do:
By the hour, Aliso Viejo poop cleanup costs less than the maid services, and they don't do poop cleanup. It cost less than blood cleanup while poop cleanup exposes the poop cleanup practitioner to at least 6,000 known viruses.
Poop cleanup should be done with patience and forethought. By the way, we also call poop cleanup "feces cleanup." Feces means poop in a fancy way. Scientists prefer the term feces as do doctors and other medical practitioners.
Poop cleanup occurs for human beings every single day of our lives, unless of course, something out of the ordinary occurs. When something out of the ordinary occurs in Aliso Viejo, I'm sometimes called to the seen for poop cleanup duties. I've been in the Aliso Viejo poop cleanup business going on 14 years.
For now, I note that we clean up after ourselves or someone else close to us. Most of us know about poop cleanup and most often many of us do not enjoy it. Of course, Aliso Viejo nurses and doctors are quite used to this task and it is not a big deal.
We need to know our poop for our own health, but many of us do not look at our poop after we pass it into a toilet. We do this because we don't want to see it. We are ashamed of our poop. We learned this sense of shame as children; not all societies raise their children to think of poop as "icky poo-poo." Other directed societies, sometimes third world nations, learn that human poop has great ingredients for fertilizing food crops. For them, poop shares an extra bonus.
It looks like global warming has finally shown itself for real, and Aliso Viejo residents will also learn to use poop for fertilizer soon enough. When those days arrive people will pay for poop rather than hire Aliso Viejo Aliso Viejo residents to remove it.
For us we learn to turn our heads from this bacterial processed substance as something not-me. This will change in the near future, within a generation most likely.
For now, we learn to disown our poop. Perhaps we were scolded for pooping in our pants and after that insulting experience we learned to avoid poop at all costs. I recall hearing children making fun of other children in school who had poop their pants. It's not a good thing to be ridiculed for one's poop behavior.
Having taught in the public school system, I can testify that once a child becomes a target of poop ridicule, that child has a hard time ahead for years to come. Bullies quickly smell a life-long victim for their sadistic abuse.
Tens of thousands of school children become targets of ridicule because their elimination organs fail them at the wrong time and place? It's Murphy's Law at work for so many of us before we hear about Murphy's work into the mysteries of our universe.
Simply adding poop awareness to our Aliso Viejo early school training and education would go a long way toward increasing our own biological knowledge. Think of the ridicule so many children could easily forego.
We all have a vested interest in a daily inspection of our poop; not under a microscope, but at least a momentary glance, peek-a-poo, or a "Just checking in" type peek. By the way, how much of our paranoia do we owe to a feeling of being watched in our toilet behavior?
So it turns out that we need a personal interest in our own poop to raise our awareness of health indicators. Our poop tells us about our internal environment and the value of the food we eat.
We need to know from early on in life that pooping belongs to the human condition. (return) We all poop everyday when healthy. In fact, people who poop one, two, three, and even four times a day are often more healthy than those of us with a meat-eating diet. Vegetarians living on fruits frequently poop throughout their days as they "graze" on fruits and veg a tables. One would think they'd get tired of pooping. Whereas heavy meat eaters are sometimes lucky to poop every other day.
We know that poop can be healthy and we know that it can be sick. In fact, some people require poop transparent. Their stomach's ecological system goes hair wire and their poop no longer breaks down. They then need healthy poop's enzymes to break down their poop
Science and medical science has taught us a lot about poop. History has also taught us a lot about poop. From the sciences we have learned that poop carries tens of millions of bacteria and even more viruses. Most of these microorganisms are friendly to our lives and help us stay healthy.
Did you know that healthy poop has about 75% water? The other 25% contains other materials. Even in Aliso Viejo. So when doing poop cleanup we are not necessarily cleaning up solid poop, but lots of water too. Beware because water evacuated with poop also carries plenty of bacteria, some friendly and some not so friendly; I keep lots of alcohol around during poop cleanup. Of course, when poop dries out, we are dealing with the real thing.
Poop carries fibers. During digestion fibers break down. It quickly forms a gel-like substance. We know about this gel and the health of our poop because when it becomes too hard we know something's wrong. When our poop becomes too soft we know something else is wrong. We look for a certain consistent composition and structure in our poop to get that right sense that all is well with our digestive tract.
Some foods like carrots can lead to digestive problems. So it's always a good idea to chew food well. Some foods have little fiber in them and these are hard to digest. We often find this is true when eating burritos and other types of Mexican food; it's the flour. Flour consists of insoluble materials as we find in corn. Just look in the toilet bowl and you'll know what you ate.
But of course if you're anything like this writer, you're probably too busy to even think about these natural processes for long. It seems that when things are going right we don't even recognize what's going on around us. Is it any wonder that we become sick and don't even recognize we have sick poop?
Many people make a point of eating leafy vegetables. My wife is one of these people are has to have a salad every single night. She makes her own salad prefers to. I will admit that the salad she does make are much better than those I can buy. In fact, I think I will go out and buy salad this afternoon. When we have those jet black fecal matter discharges we are to become concerned.
What could be mixed up in our stool, and in this case are poop becomes known as biohazardous poop. This is true of any type of fecal matter with blood in it. When bleeding occurs in the gastrointestinal tract we need to get to a doctor quickly. Aliso Viejo's hospital have what we hope will at least show us our problem.
Jet black stools tell us soon enough. We're sick. Those solid, brick-like passings ripping at our rectums tell us we live a dehydrated life-style. Blood sometimes follows and often enough infuses such poop. Worse, such stools may mask intestinal bleeding and more than simple dehydration. Drink water and a cure arrives many times.
Poop shape tells when our low-fiber diet shows the poor choice of last night's dinner -- pizza? Rather than a solid, oblong shaped stool we pass tiny islands of scant specimens.
The shape of poop should tell us that a perfect stool has a consistent shape. It does not break into pieces as pizza eaters. I speak as a hard-core pizza eater from the past.
Eating fiber helps create master poop designs. It lends bulk to stool. Fiber acts as a glue and helps to stick our poop together while ensuring a safe, orderly passage beyond our body.
Pencil thin poops, may signal rectal cancer. Rectal cancer narrows the opening in our rectum. This narrowing causes malformed poop. Poop cleanup sometimes includes this type of poop cleanup, malformed poop.
Poop cleanup carries a social stigma. This means that when people know that others like me cleanup after human poop and other animals poop, we are held in lower esteem. Many people joke about what we do for a living. They say things like, "do you know what this guy does? He cleans up shit!".
So when it comes to poop cleanup, I have to be prepared to live with insults while helping others do it tough. Of their life. It seems ironic that we can shovel horse poop all day long and nobody so much as notices. But once it's human poop we gain a lot of attention and people would rather not dine with us. That's okay with me. I have all the social contact I need. So it comes up poop cleanup call me because I to live through any embarrassment that might arise on the scene.
Older readers may recall how the Jackie Gleason show known as the Honeymooner portrayed Jackie's protagonist as a worker worker, a poop cleanup person. We know from this one TV show that the general public looked down on us poop cleanup practitioners.
Chambermaids do not remove our honey pots for these reasons:
Few of us can afford chambermaids for daily poop cleanup. The Koch brothers and Rupert Murdock control our media and they have chambermaids.
Technology brought a pseudo chambermaid into our homes as toilets.
Our feces now goes into controlled sewage treatment facilities in most cases.
Chambermaids do not remove our honey pots - - feces any longer, except for the Koch brothers and their ruling class friends.
Metabolic means processed through our metabolism, the means of grabbing and transferring nutrients from food. Waste arises as the outcome of the metabolic process completes its food grabbing work.
Feces arose from Latin and it means "dregs." Perhaps some readers remember the use of the phrase, "society's dregs." Its use inferred a less-than honorable group of people. Poop arose in popular culture as one of many variations on the more formal use of feces. So we have poop cleanup as well as feces cleanup.
Terms like shit, scat, spor, droppings, dung, pads, and others also came into use, depending upon social settings. Did I leave out guano, scat, spor and other terms used by science?
Stool stands out for me. Feces, poop, becomes stool when it serves the medical community's research needs. I suppose that our feces becomes stool for these folks as it becomes a sample.
Poop cleanup entails more than human feces at times. Diarrhea cleanup carries added infectious waste microorganisms It's much safer for everyone when the diarrhea infected person cleans their own poop. At times their diarrhea proceeded their death by hours or even moments. These days with all of our baby boomers reaching their final days, unattended death cleanup includes diarrhea cleanup many times. This type of poop cleanup has serious hazard for poop cleanup practitioners world wide.
Our elderly cannot clean when they become sick. They sometimes soil their beds, carpets, toilets, and furniture. As a biohazard cleanup practitioner I find poop cleanup calls to death cleanup scenes. It happens that callers do not know what their true cleaning problems present, poop or death fluids?
Diarrhea for most of us turns out as an inconvenient annoyance. If it doesn't shut us down for a day, it at least slows us down.
Science helps to explain why diarrhea becomes deadly rather than a mere nuisance. Science researchers show that each of us carries friendly and unfriendly bacteria in our guts. C. difficile. receives credit as the most common cause of deadly diarrhea. Every day hundreds of people die because of C. difficile's rapid growth in stomachers. Sociologists report the number of dead exceeds 500,000 each year. Mostly young children in third-world nations succumb to diarrhea caused by C. difficile. Poop cleanup has its hazards. But, it can and does happen in Aliso Viejo.
Our bodies fight back by producing defenses. Against C. difficile's rapid growth our bodies produce friendly bacteria. Given a favorable environment internally and externally, we recover. Left unchecked, diarrhea control our internal environments. Inflammation rises with diarrhea. Cell death increases. Severe gas increases pressure against our stomach's walls. Pain from gas pressure become unbearable. Dehydration and kidney failure follow as acidic and toxic fluids eat holes in our intestines.
Stomach flora consisting of toy-like cellular structures may counteract these conditions when given aid. Medical science tells us that a "super-probiotic" stool substitute created from another's healthy poop creates a healing, injection flora of microorganisms.
Now, we have a lead on controlling these conditions by increasing failed stomach flora, friendly feces bacteria, with toy-like structures. The size of microorganisms, medical researchers designed. Robo-gut to create a ‘super-probiotic’ stool substitute. (return)
I do not mean to imply cleaning up after the Savings and Loan scandals of the 70's, the $500 billion tax payer bailout; I'm not referring to the $24 trillion tax payer Wall Street bailout of 2008, either. I'm referring to real ruling class poop cleanup, for them, not by them. History tells us that chamber pots w
ere in use as early as the 6th century BC. Most likely those lower on the food chain were tasked with burying cave dwellers' poop. Social stratification had yet to develop into a genuine class society -- a ruling class with slave class and more. We know from Shakespeare and others that chambermaids were close to their ruling class leaders.
Their main task required keeping chamber pots clean and odor free. Failing at this task, even once, probably lead to unemployment. Castle staff knew they were close to the bread winners of their land. They knew too that royal poop placed bread on the maids family table.
As the story goes, disposing of this unseemingly solid waste often created huge puddles and stacks of offensive poop piles. Before long, especially in wet and moist weather, mud and poop combined. Chambermaid's shows were soaked with this cake-like combination of poop and mud. In creative style, maid's shows began to sprout higher heels to help breach the growing piles of royal shit.
Today, as our marketing gurus would have it (Edward Bern ay for one), one-time poop cleanup shoes became today's most fashionable shoe ware. That's marketing at its best!Besides, the introduction of indoor toilets displaced chamber pots. By the end of the 19th century these pots served in hospitals and sick beds in most cases. Toilets became the most common means of poop cleanup in the western world.
Chamber pots continue in use today in countries lacking indoor plumbing such as rural areas of China, and have been redesigned as the bedpan for use with the very ill. Used in the "Public Hospital for Persons of Insane and Disordered Minds"In North America and the UK, the term "potty" is often used when discussing the toilet with small children, such as during potty training.
It is also usually used to refer to the small, toilet-shaped devices made especially for potty training, which are similar to chamber pots. These "potties" are generally a large plastic bowl with an ergonomically-designed back and front to protect against splashes. They may have a built-in handle or grasp at the back to allow emptying and a non-slip bottom to prevent the child from sliding while in use.
Some are given bright colors, and others feature some gentle or inoffensive drawing or cartoon character. In many cases they are used since it is difficult for children to maneuver themselves up onto the normal toilet; in addition the larger opening in the regular toilet is much too large for a child to sit over comfortably and not fall in without some type of aid. Their size means they can be packed away in a bag for days out or when camping with young children, and can be placed near or under beds for sufferers of nocturia or some other form of incontinence.
Like any other free enterprise business, my poop cleanup business reflects the cost of doing business. Internet marketing costs thousands of dollars every year. Vehicles cost money. Insurance for vehicles and business insurance cost thousands of dollars. Then there's the maintenance, gas, oil changes, tires, and more.
While some clients do resent my poop cleanup prices, they do not resent my service. When they ask, "Why do you charge so much?", I remind them of the odors and visual offense human feces creates. In face, human poop cleanup most often offends this poop cleanup practitioner more than any other animal poop cleanup. Bird, canine, and feline poop cleanup does not come close to the offensive nature of human poop.
So, sometimes I ask, "How much would you charge for the same service?". Of course this rhetorical question sometimes causes hostility. They could easily have cleaned up the own poop, but turned to me. So, this retort follows the "How can you?" and "Why do you charge so much?" questions.
These questions bring to mind that poop cleanup came as an "add-on" to my other businesses. I am known as a "biohazard cleanup practitioner." So poop cleanup as an add-on was simple enough. In the biohazard business the Sheriff-Coroner employees steal my work. They direct victims families away from the Internet and telephone books.
So adding poop cleanup became a necessity for a guy that wants a business in cleaning. Besides, poop cleanup has its unseen benefits. I get paid in cash. There's nothing bad about cash payment for poop cleanup. Besides, I know a bit of biology and poop has a biological place in our world. So poop cleanup work has no ego problems for me.
While visiting others in the hospital I sometimes wonder how doctors and nurses tolerate the odors and the scene. I'm a biohazard cleanup practitioner and the idea of changing an infant's diapers remains repulsive to me; yet, I can cleanup poop anywhere in Aliso Viejo, but for someone's bottom. I know that one becomes less concerned with the odors and scenes and noises of poop cleanup as time passes. But diapers? Yes, I'm a strange character in some ways. I don't change diapers because I have had no cause to do so. I do not regret it.
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